Where is the one place in the house that you avoid? For me it is the never-ending clutter of the back closet. I have shoved so much crap in there – old clothes, pictures, scrapbooks, everything that I have been trying to shove in the back corner of my life. However, my back closet has spilled over into an entire room of junk. I have no idea why I keep all this stuff or why I haven’t taken the time to clean it out.

The departure of my husband hasn’t helped the situation. I have completely avoided that back room and back closet because the whole thing is too hard to face. It’s becoming difficult because my entire home is clean and tidy except that one back room where I have now concluded is where I hide all my fears and pain that I am trying to avoid.

One of these days I am definitely going to have to face it. In the upcoming months, I will be shipping my husband’s clothes back to him in New York and will have to try and at least tidy up back there as well as tidy up my feelings. I have also concluded that these things are intertwined, and a lot of my avoidant behavior comes from the fact that I don’t like confrontation or even facing my fears or tackling them head on. So, the clutter in my life, (as the daily writing prompt suggests), is both physical as well as mental and will take a lot of hard work to address because my complacency has completely set in. I honestly don’t feel like dealing with it, I feel like hiding from it where it is safe and warm. How do I get myself out of it? Your guess is as good as mine.

Stay tuned.

Bloganuary writing prompt
Where can you reduce clutter in your life?
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Published by inspiredodyssey

In a whole new world after leaving NYC in 2020. Left my husband, started over, 4 years sober and living on my own. Fell deeply in love again, only for it to turn complicated and heartbreaking. Trying to navigate my way through it all, while maintaining my friendships, honoring my newly found faith, and living life independently.

3 thoughts on “Avoiding the Closet”

  1. I hope you will find the moment to attack that closet soon. I have found that leaving this type of pain hanging around is damaging. Set one goal to find his clothes and set everything else aside. Maybe you find other things you want to send him too while you are looking. But get that done. Ship that crap out of your life asap. Give up that part as soon as you can. Holding on to that may just be the thing keeping you from moving another step forward. Been there…Katherine

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    1. Thank you so much Katherine! Since that last blog post, I took a day and asked my parents to come over and sent out three HUGE boxes out to him in New York and cleaned out all his stuff in the back room I went ahead and put a really nice comfy bed in there and dressed it up with beautiful butterflies to make a really pretty guest room for my friends. It was a huge accomplishment! Thanks so much for your advice, it has made the whole process of moving on easier. Thanks again for your comment, sorry it took so long for me to get back to you! ❤

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