I Learned the Quintessential Art and Practice of Gratitude

This seems like a beaten to death lesson, because everywhere you look, someone is saying the “attitude of gratitude” is the key to a happy life. But is it really? I have to say, YES. I have spent a very long time beating myself up, feeling the worst of the worst for my sinful nature, enveloped in my own sense of self. This self-serving way of living kept me locked in a box for 15 years – feeling so fat and ugly I couldn’t even function in society – well, jokes on me because I am 50 pounds heavier than I was then living the best life I could possibly live now! Who knew?

It all comes from the art of gratitude. It is, in essence an art. Today was a crazy day. It poured like crazy in my city and I was running around trying to get everything done. I had one of the most productive days of my life, but not once did I say a simple “thank you.” That’s my biggest mistake right there, and I am working hard at rectifying it. So, every day, I am skillfully homing in on my craft and recognizing how I can master this art.

I sent my husband away months ago and have been living the best life I can live on my own. The sense of independence is intoxicating, so much so that I don’t need any kind of substance to replicate the high of being on my own every day. My comfy bed, which used to be my nemesis because it used to beckon me at all hours of the day where I wasted away my life, is no longer an enemy, but a friend to be made pretty every morning so I can be welcomed at night. I make sure I make my bed in the morning now, so there is no chance I will find myself crawling back in it during the day. It’s little practices like that I have adapted which make me grateful for everything I have today.

I turn 44 this year. I was at a point in where I believed I needed to be married with a family so badly, that living on my own would be such a sad and lonely existence, but I think it was the unknown that I feared. This unknown territory is scary, (the lights went out for a few moments earlier this evening, and I panicked at being alone here in the dark), but again I am grateful the lights came back on and can practice at least ten more things I am thankful for before bed.

Gratitude is a state of being. Vibrations dictate that if you exude gratitude, positive things will come to you – that’s the most basic principle of the Law of Attraction which isn’t just some “woo woo” nonsense that I once thought it was. There is an art to this practice, that has to be done with care and love as if it is a child you are nurturing. You are nurturing your own psyche, telling the subconscious mind, (which is like a child), the most basic affirmations: “I am beautiful, I am a millionaire, I am happy” simple action statements which you confirm throughout the day with life’s little gifts. See affirmations don’t work if they are not confirmed. All you need is a speck of proof that these affirmations work by practicing the art of gratitude to make them a reality, or as close to reality as possible. The confirmation that I am a millionaire is the most basic. I am a millionaire because I live 30 minutes away from my loving parents and spent every Sunday with them. I am a millionaire because I have so many friends and people who love me when I never had a single friend all those years ago. I am a millionaire because I have no want or need, my bills are paid, I have a full fridge, and I wake up with no worry, not a single one. It may not be in “dollars”, but I am a millionaire, nonetheless.

I am a firm believer, (especially after reading some of my old blogs), that God has blessed me with the one thing I am the most grateful for: peace. All the weight I gained, all the bumps on my face, the clothes that don’t fit me, the guys that don’t look at me anymore, the empty bed, the scary nights when the power goes out, the nights of loneliness, all of that does not compare to the PEACE I have found. All those things are infinitesimal compared to the epitome of peace.

And how do you get that peace? Gratitude. Just that simple.

And that’s the last thing that I have learned, the most important lesson of my life.

Stay Tuned.

Daily writing prompt
What is the last thing you learned?

Complaining about Not Getting The “One Thing” We Think We’re Missing

Always missing the target. Is this what we all do, like ALL the time? We don’t make enough money, we don’t have a partner, we can’t see to get down to an ideal weight, just mountains of complaints. But I think the big one is complaining that we are not happy.

Happiness is not something that can be obtained. I learned this through a lot of trial and error. There will always be something that we want or strive for, and we keep missing the actual blessings that we have already received. Have you ever noticed that we’re always trying to obtain that One Thing we think we’re missing? What I mean is, I have found myself in a situation with mourning over my failed relationship when I have so many other riches some people would kill for. I am living comfortably, with an OK job that pays the bills, I have a nice reliable car, some extra passive income, and my very own place with absolute peace of mind. So why am I beating myself up so much about this failed relationship?

It’s because it’s what we do, that’s why. The Human Condition is so effed up sometimes. I am literally tormenting myself to the point where my mental health is suffering too. I am not sleeping AT ALL, causing me more worry and heartache than anything else. And for what? For love? You guys don’t really know my story, but I have been chasing men for the past 20 years, hoping to find love so badly that I ignore everything else, including all the red flags. God has saved me so many times, especially through all the jails and institutions, and honestly, I need to start appreciating the blessings.

People keep telling me to make gratitude lists, but that’s not really my thing. Affirmations are a little better for me. It kind of solidifies the things I have trouble putting on the gratitude lists. But the complaining and the whining happens anyway. Sometimes I feel like a 4-year-old in an older lady’s body. What I do to myself is nothing less than a tantrum. So, today’s lesson is less complaining more thankfulness. I don’t know how well I can stick to it, but just for today, I am going to try my hardest.

Stay tuned.

Bloganuary writing prompt
What do you complain about the most?