I can never stick to a resolution, so I never make any at the beginning of the year. Why set myself up for failure when I can just… keep things ambiguous and filled with vague hope?
I’ve been working on a book for the past twenty years. Yes, twenty. That’s two decades of “almost had it” and “just one more scene” and “where’s my snack?” And don’t even get me started on this so-called weight loss journey—if we’re being honest, it’s been less of a journey and more of a layover in a food court. I’ve gained 40 pounds in the wrong direction, and my emotional compass is still somewhere between “I should try” and “pass me the big piece of chocolate cake.”
I deeply desire to stick to my goals—but here’s the kicker: I have the discipline of a drunken sailor who just got shore leave and hasn’t seen a woman in a year. I get bored. I get overwhelmed. I spiral in silence and disappear into the vortex of chatrooms, forums, and omg Reddit, yes Reddit, that damn Reddit – and existential dread.
But I do have one incredible, titanium-strength win in my corner: I’ve been sober for five years. That’s not nothing—that’s huge. If I can do that, surely I can manage to shake my ass to a few dance workouts and open a damn Word document without melting into a shame puddle. Right?
Maybe.
We’re gonna find out.
So, here’s my baby-step blueprint—a Two-Week Plan for the Undisciplined, Unruly, and Unapologetically Human—to build new habits, sweat a little (but cutely), and stop collapsing every time life goes radio silent, (when he doesn’t call and my whole world crumbles into shame, guilt and hours of crying, how pathetic).
🔥 Two-Week “Get-It-Together-Lynn” Plan™
⭐️ Week One: The Warm-Up Week
Barely Doing the Thing is Still Doing the Thing.
🕺 MONDAY: The Great Unfurling
- Goal: Just move. No expectations.
- Action: One dance video. Literally one. Even if I flail. Especially if I flail.
- Book Work: Open the doc. Scroll through it. That’s it. I don’t have to write, just reacquaint myself with it like it’s a long-lost ex I’m stalking on Instagram.
- Mindset Move: Say this out loud: “Discipline isn’t sexy. But I am.”
🍜 TUESDAY: Meal of Queens
- Goal: Eat one actual vegetable. Not a garnish. Not salsa. A real one.
- Action: Cook or order something green. Bonus points if it crunches.
- Dance: One video + freestyle my own silly routine after.
- Book: Write one paragraph. Doesn’t have to be good. Just has to exist.
💡 WEDNESDAY: Midweek Miracle
- Goal: Make Mr. California’s silence work for me, not against me.
- Action: Set a 15-minute timer. Do something focused (book/dance/clean/anything) with no distractions. Then reward myself with the dumbest meme I can find.
- Book: Write a list: “Scenes I still want to write.” No pressure. Just play.
📦 THURSDAY: Shuffle & Declutter
- Goal: Clear the chaos just a little.
- Action: Clean one thing. A drawer. A shelf. A pile. Blast music while I do it.
- Dance: Put on a song that makes you feel sexy and MOVE.
- Book: Re-read something I wrote that I like. Bask in my own brilliance.
🌙 FRIDAY: Fancy Friday
- Goal: Romance myself.
- Action: Dress cute, even if you’re I’m home. Light a candle. Make my coffee like it’s a $7 café drink.
- Dance: One routine. Lip sync like I’m auditioning for The Voice.
- Book: Write a love letter to my main character. Remind them (and me) why they matter.
💤 SATURDAY: Lazy, Not Dead
- Goal: Gentle motion + gentle kindness.
- Action: Stretch for 10 minutes. Then nap like a Victorian heroine.
- Silence Prep: Make a Silent Survival List: stuff I can do when everything feels empty.
- Book: Set a timer for 10 minutes. Brain dump whatever is in my head.
☀️ SUNDAY: Soul Reset
- Goal: Reflect, reset, recommit.
- Action: Take myself on a solo date (even just to the living room). Journal three things that made me smile this week.
- Dance: Put on a slow, romantic song. Move like I’m dancing for someone I adore. (Yes, maybe him. Or maybe you.)
💥 WEEK TWO: Gentle Repetition = Real Habit
We’re not being “good”—we’re just being better than yesterday.
This week? I’m just repeating Week One. No fancy upgrades. No overachieving. Just loop it again—with slightly more confidence, slightly more consistency, and the knowledge that I didn’t crumble.
If I miss a day? I start again the next. There is no failing in this plan. There’s only showing up with my messy hair, last night’s mascara, and a desire to not live in chaos forever.
I may completely be undisciplined with procrastination in my bones, but dammit, I won’t let these big challenges break me this year.
Happy 2026!
Stay tuned.
An Inspired Odyssey Through✨️Ink & Stardust✨️ 